If you’ve hung around my corner of the internet, you probably know my story with depression.
In 2014, I walked through a severe depression that threatened my life. It was– and still is– the most challenging four months of my life. I believe that I am alive today because of a good community, good doctors, sound therapy, and a good, good God. These things had to be in place for me to recover and rebuild how I did.
I know the story of severe depression might not be your story. But I also know that so many of us have come through a crippling past two years. Some of us are still in the thick of it. Rates of anxiety and depression have never been higher. The world is full of turmoil as we try to navigate a way forward. More than anything, I hope you know that you are not wrong or bad if your life feels like it is in flux. We’re over here enduring some crazy circumstances, and we’re still standing. So cheers to us.
Today I wanted to share a practice that helped save my life. I should start with a disclaimer that this is not the only thing that helped me, and it cannot take the place of medical attention if you need it. There is no shame here in this space regarding seeking therapy and medication.
But this practice helped me then, in 2014, and still helps me today. It is a game-changer when I experience a day that feels overwhelming and hard. A day where my brain feels scattered and confused. A day where I would rather curl back up in bed and sleep until tomorrow.
I got this practice from a dear friend, Chrisy. I was at her house one morning, and we were having coffee. Depression is an illness that likes to hear its name, so I was, naturally, obsessing over it. I was ruminating and trying to figure out how I got to this dark place. I would spend hours talking about that to anyone who bothered to hear it.
At one point, Chrisy stopped me.
Loving yet sternly, she let me know that we were going to stop talking about the depression for a moment. We were going to pick a new battle plan.
She instructed me to go home and pull out a piece of paper. On top of that piece of paper, I scribbled the words “LITTLE VICTORIES.” Then, I began to write down every single task I accomplished that day on that piece of paper. I mean, every little thing.
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Take a shower
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Send an email
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Write a letter
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Take my medication
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Meet with Heather
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Send an encouraging text
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Clean up my space
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Write for 15 minutes
When you are overwhelmed and feeling stuck, every small task is a victory. The wildest thing began to happen: I started to gain momentum and motivation to brave new tasks and keep adding to my list.
At the end of the day, I did what Chrisy told me to: I took a picture of that entire page of little victories and sent it to her. If depression wanted to convince me that I would never move forward, this paper full of small victories told a different story.
That’s it. That’s the whole strategy:
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Take out a blank piece of paper
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Write “LITTLE VICTORIES” on the top
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Write down every little thing you manage to do this day (because it all matters)
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Snap a photo and send it to someone for accountability (scroll down for more on this) that you got out of bed today.
It seems too simple, but I cannot tell you the number of Little Victories lists I’ve made over the years. Anytime I’m anxious. Anytime I feel stuck. Anytime I feel sad or depressed.
It’s not about ruling the day or being the most productive. It’s about showing up for yourself, even when it’s hard, and taking that next right step forward.
The Challenge
So here’s what I want you to do: I want you to save this post somewhere. I have a folder on my computer called “Rainy Day,” where I keep pieces of writing that I know will encourage me when I need them the most. I want you to have this post ready for when that hard day shows up, and you feel paralyzed in your fear.
And if today is that day, then I want you to stop everything you are doing. Put down the phone. Take out a blank piece of paper or turn to a new page in your notebook. Write “LITTLE VICTORIES” on the top of the page and just get started.
You read this post today- write down that victory.
You made your babe a meal today- write down that victory.
You said a prayer today- write down that victory.
I dare you to fill that page with every single thing you manage to do today. And then, when you finish the day, and you are curling up to go to sleep, here’s what I want you to do:
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Take a photo of your list.
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Send the photo to info@hannahbrencher.com.
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Use the subject line: LITTLE VICTORIES.
Yes, please take a photo and send it to me. My inbox is open as a safe harbor for your little victories. If you need someone to say, “Good job, babe. You made it through the day,” then come find me.
Remember: no task is too small. No task is insignificant. You’re courageous, and all your steps forward count.
Wake up tomorrow. Rinse and repeat for best results. You’re going to make it through these challenging days. I believe that for you. I do not doubt it because I’ve been to the darkest parts of the woods before, and I made my way out of them. I know it is possible for anyone if it was possible for me.
tying you closer than most,
hb.
I’d love to hear from you:
In moving my blog to a newer platform, I sadly had to let go of the thousands of comments and conversations that came from readers over the last 10+ years. This grieves me deeply but I know there will new conversations, fresh words of wisdom, and opportunities to create close community once again. I’d love to hear from you in the comments section. I’ll be reading + replying on a regular basis.
I like this new site and will be a regular reader. You have helped me so many times when I needed to read some inspiration and from a compassionate person. You are wonderful! Thanks Hannah. A big hug sent to you.
Thank you for being here, Sheila! Means the world to me!!
I love your messages. They are the difference between soft rabbit fur and a stone wall.
Thank you for being here, Jennifer!
Hannah your posts are everything, absolutely everything♥️♥️♥️ Thank you thank you thank you♥️♥️♥️
I’m so glad I came across your blog 🙂
I love this idea. Lists help me because I write to think. I did a "God’s little provisions" list today as well as a "How I know he’s at work in me" list. Remembering these things is rescuing when the doubt is loud.
I love this idea! Seeing accomplishments in black and white will be really helpful for me. Going to try it next time I’m feeling stuck.
Hannah, I’m a Marriage and Family Therapist, and I’m grateful for your work. Your life work, and how you share it. I sit with others every day and cheer them on and encourage them to believe they matter. When your voice comes along with that work, my clients feel the community. They don’t feel alone. They hear "someone else beside my therapist (who I pay?!?) believes I’m worth turning toward change." Your faithful movement of caring for ourselves, in the end lets us love each other. Keep caring for yourself too, and that little sweet family…so we can all turn toward life work together:)
Thank you Hannah, that was just what I needed to read today 🙂
I love this
Thank you for this, Hannah. It gives me hope. I will try the “Little Victories” exercise and send you my lists. I’m so good at finding the negative in myself and in each day, and I know I need this practice to help me renew my mind. Please pray that I will start this and be faithful! It will be a struggle at first. Thanks again…and don’t forget to keep writing your lists, too!
In Christ,
Crystal